Power Breakfast trends in the USA

They took out the bit where I said this is not actually a recession fad but a longer term trend... but you get to watch me shovel some eggs benny into my face...

http://www.thebostonchannel.com/video/28001977/detail.html

Break of Dawn, Orange County

Fancy eggs in the most unlikely of places. In this case, a shopping strip in Orange County, playing host to a very impressive serve of designer eggs benedict. Nicely trimmed poached eggs, artsy swirls of pesto hollandaise, fat slabs of juicy ham, all carefully balanced on a couple of slices of toasted potato bread. They do breakfast in style at Break of Dawn, 24351 Avenida De La Carlota, Laguna Hills, California. And not a real housewife in sight.

Snooze, Denver

Most people rave about the pancakes. But who wants pancakes when there's a signature house-made English muffin to be had? A rare treat and one that didn't disappoint. I am now thinking of every reason I can to spend more time in Denver. Because more time in Denver means more visits to Snooze, an "eatery" singularly devoted to breakfast...

The Ritz-Carlton, Grand Cayman

You know I have a very bad reputation - Avery Tolar

The Cayman Islands can thank John Grisham for their bad reputation. Based on the adventures of Avery, Mitch and Abby, you'd be forgiven for thinking the Caymans is the go-to place for money laundering, over-billing and extra-marital hanky panky. But it's also quite the beach resort. And for breakfast by the beach, it doesn't get much better than the buffet at the Ritz, Seven Mile Beach, Grand Cayman, Tel +1 (345) 943-9000.



As a general rule, hotel breakfast buffets are things best avoided. Like stingrays. But every rule has exceptions. And the Ritz buffet is one of them. Everything was good. Perky eggs benny. Spicy jerk potatoes. Thick and spongy slabs of french toast. Juicy caramelized banana. Fresh waffles. Custom-built omelettes. Fresh fruit. Local specialties like fish escoveitch. And a very delicious mushroom quiche.

Le Petit Dejeuner, Toronto

When in Canada, be sure to try some peameal bacon, ideally with poached eggs and hollandaise on top...

Blond Coffee, Angaston

After three hours of wine tasting, some excellent St Hallett shiraz, quite a few nips of port, not much spitting and too much swallowing, I could feel the dreaded day-drinker's hangover creeping up on me. I had to take defensive measures. I needed to pull out the big guns. I needed eggs benedict. But it was 2:30pm in the Barossa Valley. And all-day breakfast is a big city thing. Or so I thought. Until we stumbled upon Blond Coffee, 60 Murray Street, Angaston, South Australia, Tel +61 8 8564 3444. They served eggs benny till 3 pm. I was saved.



And a very respectable eggs benny it was, too. The free-range eggs had a great deep yellow colour and were poached to perfection. The ham was tasty. The hollandaise was good (but needed more zing). And there was a nice little splodge of sauteed spinach on the side.

The eggs and bacon sandwich was, according to Ron, equally impressive (and I know better than to argue with the in-laws). Two super-thick slabs of white bread, stuffed with scrambled egg, bacon (from local Barossa butcher Schultz's), cheese and tomato, all squished down in a sandwich press and toasted golden brown.

Despite the name, the staff at Blond are not all blondes, although there was a very high concentration of attractive young women. And friendly young women, too. When I asked for a sample of the bircher muesli, they even when to the trouble of garnishing it with a touch of yoghurt and a drizzle of honey.

16/20 "barossa benedict"

Jamieson Grille, Alexandria

"Death ray my ass" said the patent attorney leaning in from the window "It hardly even slows them down"

It might not be such a good idea to book a window seat at the Jamieson Grille, Westin Alexandria, 400 Courthouse Square, Alexandria, VA, Tel +1 (703) 253-8640. It's right near the USPTO and crawling with patent attorneys. Scary.



Being quite the daredevil, I plonked myself down at a window table and ordered the "poached organic egg salmon benedict" with wilted spinach, English muffin, and "olive oil citrus hollandaise". And that's what I got. One egg. One muffin. Note the careful use of the singular for both "egg" and "muffin". It's a lawyer-proof menu. You want two eggs? Order two serves.

What would be funny would be to re-write the menu in patent-speak: at least one meal of salmon benedict including at least one egg served together with at least one muffin and at least one portion of salmon accompanied by hollandaise sauce wherein said at least one egg is poached, said at least one muffin is English, said at least one portion of salmon is smoked and said hollandaise includes olive oil and at least one form of citrus extract. And let's not forget the dependent claim: the aforementioned salmon benedict, served with at least one leaf of spinach wherein said at least one leaf of spinach is wilted.

I won't attempt this for the whole menu. Instead, I will share some brief highlights. Like blueberry orange granola flapjacks with citrus berry salad, warm maple syrup and whipped butter. Or baked organic egg and chicken apple sausage with spinach and artisan marscapone. Or steel cut oat brulee with honey glazed green apples, bananas and toasted pecans. They called them "steal cut" but that must be a typo. I'm sure the Westin would never serve stolen oats.

The Jamieson is a very swish venue, with good service and reasonable prices if you don't mind half portions. Except for the Starbucks coffee, which, at $4.50, is daylight robbery.

16/20 "nice egg"

Columbus Cafe and Bar, Boston

Maybe they do a great brunch at Columbus Cafe and Bar, 535 Columbus Avenue, Boston (South End), Tel +1 (617) 247-9001. And maybe Joaquin Pheonix will make a great rapper. Or maybe not. At the end of the day, these are matters of opinion.



If you believe the opinions on Yelp, this place deserves 4 out of 5 stars and is good for brunch. One Yelper even rates the Maine Eggs Benedict her favorite brunch dish ever. As Flavor Fav would say, don't believe the hype. This just proves that too much opinion can be just as bad as too little. Because there is no way I would rate the eggs benny as anything other than a bare pass. The poached eggs were good, and the crab cakes weren't bad, but it was all downhill from there. The hollandaise was like cold whipped butter, completely devoid of tang. The muffins were absolutely rock hard and stale. The home fries were too greasy. And I really don't see the point of the cold slide of tomato.

I have no doubt that loyal locals will be spitting out their Vermont Scrambles or choking on their chorizo as they read this. So let me just say that I get that it's cozy, I liked the coffee, and the staff seemed very nice. My gripe is the food. Like Joaquin's rapping, it needs much work. In my humble opinion, of course.

13/20 "over hyped"

75 Chestnut, Beacon Hill

The tourists go for a drink at Cheers on Beacon Street. The locals walk an extra 2 blocks across the flat of the hill, to 75 Chestnut Street, Beacon Hill, for a meal at the mysteriously named 75 Chestnut. It's a great spot for dinner. So-so for brunch.

Glo's, Seattle

Slow food is all hip and trendy these days. Not at Glo's, 1621 E Olive Way, Seattle, WA, Tel +1 206 324 2577. It's just classic diner food that happens to come out slowly. Very slowly. So come early and be prepared to sit around and wait. Because breakfast at Glo's is worth the wait.



Despite being a humble diner, Glo's is most famous for eggs benedict, the show pony of the breakfast world. They serve five different breeds of benny: classic Canadian bacon; smoked salmon; Florentine (with spinach); Californian (with Avocado); and Blackstone (with strip bacon and sauteed spinach). Most importantly, the house made hollandaise is very good, and the hashbrowns are delicious: soft and crispy cakes of shredded spud. Yum.

Brasserie James, Clapham South

A global financial meltdown is probably not the ideal timing to be opening a mediocre restaurant in London. Which is bad news for Brasserie James, 47 Balham Hill, Clapham South, London, Tel +44 20 8772 0057. Because we are in the middle of a global financial meltdown and, based on their brunch performance, Brasserie James is mediocre.



The croque was average, at best. I like a nice thick croque. This one was model-thin. The eggs benedict was average. I like soft poached eggs. These were so hard we sent them back.

wd~50, New York

Eggs Benedict is genius. It’s eggs covered in eggs. I mean, come on, that person should be the president.

Wylie Dufresne

If you prefer art over porn, then get yourself to wd~50, 50 Clinton Street, New York, Tel +1 212 477 2900. Because art is the best way to describe Wylie Dufresne's eggs benedict. Not so much an object of lust, as something to stare at, contemplate and admire.



So how do you turn eggs benedict into a work of art? You season and slow poach the yolks in a cyclindrical sleeve to create a column of fudgy egg. You spear that with a wafer of crispy bacon. Then you seal a cube of hollandaise inside a crust of muffin crumbs and deep fry till golden brown. Easy.

Just don't expect deep satisfaction. This is Picaso, not porno, and in two mouthfuls it's gone.

Charley's, Boston

The FCC is worried that gullible Americans might be tricked into buying stuff by embedded advertising, a sneaky form of product placement that's woven into the plot so that (a) you don't think it's an ad, and (b) you can't skip over it with your TiVo. Instead of watching a Kirstie Alley weight-loss ad during an episode of Cheers, you watch Rebecca Howe telling Sam she owes her sexy new look to Jenny Craig. You get the idea.



But don't be fooled. Jenny Craig is not the answer. I have a much better strategy for weight-loss: start the day with breakfast at a place that serves really disgusting home fries, like Charley's, 284 Newbury Street in Boston's Back Bay, Tel +1 (617) 266-3000. It's easy to cut back on the carbs when the potatoes are cold, soggy and smothered in white pepper. I hate white pepper. And I really hate it on cold soggy home fries.

Luckily, the filet mignon benedict was much better than the home fries. Take a traditional eggs benedict, swap the ham for a couple of slabs of tender beef, switch the hollandaise for a nice tarragon-infused bernaise, and as Gordon Ramsay would say... done. It's great if you're in the mood for meat.

Although the staff at Charley's were all very chipper and friendly, they really had no eye for detail. We ordered Irish breakfast tea to come out with the food (extra tea-bags please, if that's all you've got), and out came a single tea bag of English breakfast. I asked for little or no ice in my bloody mary, and I got enough to sink the Titanic. And when the eggs benny arrived, the fruit garnish was topped with a bonus piece of somebody else's left-over, yolk-soaked muffin. How it fell off an inbound plate and onto an outbound plate is a mystery which nobody could explain, but the manager was very apologetic, and they didn't charge us for the meal (nor for the extra scrap of vintage muffin).

Nonetheless, as long as you keep an eye out for foreign objects, Charley's serves some pretty decent food in a very pleasant setting (the outside tables are especially pleasant). They even throw in a bonus bloody mary, mimosa or Bud-light with each of the brunch specialties (eggs, french toast, pancakes, omelettes, etc).

But whatever you do, don't eat the home fries, or you might end up looking like this.

12/20 "homeless fries"

Panificio, Boston

You'd think that with Mrs Heinz living up the road you could get some baked beans for breakfast. But not if you go to Panificio, 144 Charles Street, Beacon Hill. Not a bean to be found. So eggs benny it was, served on "English muffin bread", whatever that is.



Turns out to be some kind of vaguely circular toast, with very little in common with an English muffin. Not that this was a problem. The muffin-toast, eggs and hollandaise were all pretty good. The weak link was the so-called home fries: four chunks of potato, none of which seemed to have spent much time in the frying-pan. Another weak link was the mysterious slice of cantaloupe, which was caught in the twilight zone between side and garnish. It wasn't much good as the former (too thin and dry). Nor was it much good as the latter (it made the dish look stupid, not pretty).

Looking back at the Panificio menu I can see that I misspoke, Hillary-style, about the beans. You can, in fact, get yourself a tasty serve of huevos rancheros, black-beans included. It's only if you're looking for Heinz baked beans that you'll be disappointed. But this is probably part of a deliberate environmental initiative of the Heinz Endowments. Never mind that Therese jets about in a Gulfstream and drives three gas-guzzling SUVs. The real solution to global warming is to boycott baked-beans at breakfast. Join the BBB@B movement and reduce your carbon fart-print today.

If I go back to Panificio (which is not out of the question), I think I'll try the French toast. The only question is: which version? The apple-cinnamon raisin-bread version? Or the Challah version stuffed with cream cheese, blueberries, strawberries and banana? Decisions, decisions...

Arthur and Pats, Marshfield MA

I think if I was allergic to dairy I'd kill myself - Michael Scott

I wonder if Steve Carrell improvised this line while thinking of the bread pudding french toast at Arthur & Pat's, 239 Ocean St, Brant Rock, MA, Tel +1 (781) 834-9755? Apparently he is (or was) a Marshfield local, and it's hard to believe you could live near this place without being drawn in for a bite, and that once bitten, your world view wouldn't be permanently and irrevocably damaged. I ate the french toast. And my world has been twisted.

What could be better than a big, fat, spongy slab of bread and butter pudding (made from recycled croissants and brioche), soaked in eggs, fried, then smothered in creme anglaise, caramel and whipped cream? What could be worse than living without it?

Well, nothing. That's what.

Mind you, eating this stuff more than once a year will probably kill you.

Damned if you do. Damned if you don't.

To avoid this catch-22, you may want to dodge the sweet stuff and try the lobster omelet, or the filet mignon eggs benny, or the omelet with sweet roasted peppers and provolone. I tried the crab eggs benny and wasn't disappointed. Good eggs and hollandaise. A decent amount of crab. And a bonus serve of spinach.



Arthur & Pat's is a diner-style venue with bunched up tables, and bar seating if you're flying solo. It's nothing fancy, but it is colorful. The walls are plastered all over with flyers describing what's on the menu. It looks like a bunch of hippies were dosed up on acid and let loose with paper, crayons and glue.

Just be sure to check your dates before schlepping down from Boston. They close from November to March.

Greasy Joe's Slips

Finally, after all this time, Babka has a challenger (and I'm not talking beans). Greasy Joe's can thank the waitress in the stripy red top for its rapid slide from the Breakfast Blog Top 20 to not-worth-wasting-your-time-and-money. Not only did they fail to clear plates, and forget about coffee orders for well over 30 minutes, but when we walked up to re-order and inquire, they really didn't care. A couple of us even made a point of clearing our own plates, but still no-one got the message that perhaps we'd like some service.



Here are some tips for anyone running a cafe or restaurant:

1. Please try to look at the customers as you buzz about the venue. There is nothing more frustrating to be waiting for some help, your head bobbing up and down like a prairie dog, only to be treated like an invisible hobbit wearing the ring of power.

2. Make sure that, having ignored tip #1, when a customer starts wandering aimlessly around the venue in search of assistance, you show them some love and tell them you're sorry, even if you have to fake it. At this point, the customer may be a little sarcastic, as in, "Do you think maybe we could get our coffees within the next hour or two?" Don't be sarcastic back. Don't tell them "there's no need to be rude." Don't give them lip. Because if you've kept someone waiting over 30 minutes for a cup of coffee, they've earned a free pass to make at least two sarcastic comments, maybe even three. Grit your teeth and smile.

If only stripy red top knew these simple rules I might consider going back to GJ's one day. Unfortunately, she didn't. And I won't.

BTW, the eggs benny was OK, but nothing special. Go to The Galleon instead.

The Galleon, St Kilda

The thing that's attached to the typewriter. Little animal with a ball. Little animal, small... Creeps about, not a rat.

Bubble, AbFab

If bubble you crave, then get yourself down to The Galleon, 9 Carlisle Street, Tel +61 3 9534 8934, where they serve it with squeak, and a big fat banger, on toast. Or sans banger, if you prefer. Bursting with peas, corn, and other items of mystery mush, it looked very satisfying.



Last time I was here I had the sweet potato hash cakes. This time I went for eggs benny, with ham and spinach, and a hash cake on the side. And a wise choice it was, even if I do say so myself. The eggs were good. The bagel was better than a muffin. The hollandaise was thick and creamy. A very respectable, if slightly unconventional, interpretation of the classic benedict.

The coffee was also very respectable. Well above average. As were the staff. A little quirky, like Bubble. But not nearly as stupid. Not stupid at all, actually.

The only problem with The Galleon is the lack of ventilation. On a hot day, you really need to go dressed in speedos and thongs. Any more clothing and you'll start to sweat. Someone did try to improve things by ripping a hole in the ceiling, but even that hasn't quite fixed the problem.

Sonsie, Boston

If it's bad eggs benedict you seek, look no further than Sonsie, 327 Newbury St, Boston, MA, Tel +1 (617) 351-2500. The eggs were half-raw, ditto the muffins, and the hollandaise tasted weird, and not in a good way. Clearly people don't come here for the food. Maybe it's all about the people watching? No Tom and Gisele sightings on my watch.

Harvard Club of New York

So, the burning question: was the Harvard Club's eggs benny better than the Yale Club?

Chroma, Boston