Animal Orchestra, Carlton

I've said it before, but I'll say it again: baked-eggs-in-a-pan is the breakfast fad of 2007. And like all true fads, I'm tipping this one won't last. Which isn't good news for Animal Orchestra, 163 Grattan Street, Carlton, Tel +61 3 9349 4944. Baked-eggs-in-a-pan is all they serve (unless you count muesli and toast). But as baked eggs go, the flavours were good.



My main objections to baked eggs are two. First, you sometimes get a slight tinny taste where the food has started to react with the iron of the pan. There were slight hints of this in my serve of eggs, beans and cheese today. Second, the dish is just slightly more annoying to eat than plain old eggs-on-toast. I can never decide whether to hold the toast and dunk it in the eggs, or to rip up bits of toast and sprinkle them through the dish like croutons. Call me picky.

I'm sure there will be baked-egg mavens who will disagree with my fad prediction. And I am quite happy to be proven wrong. But once you've experienced the tinny taste a couple of times, I can't see people going back for more. Maybe the secret is to use enamel pans?

If you like baked eggs, Animal Orchestra certainly has plenty to offer: bacon, tomato mushroom and cheese; potato, leek and shanklish; caramelised witlof and goat's cheese; smoked salmon, dill, capers and onions; and sardines and fetta.

The venue is quirky. Outside they have lots of little stools for Melbourne Uni types to perch on. Inside it looks like someone wallpapered the place with random magazine clippings, including a sprinkling of soft porn (or maybe it was art?).

13/20 "fully baked"

Balzari, Carlton

Unless you were sleeping under a rock (or locked up in Guantanamo Bay) during the TomKat wedding, you would know that Tom vowed to provide Katie with "a pan, a comb, perhaps a cat". So you can imagine my reaction when breakfast arrived this morning at Balzari, 130 Lygon Street, Carlton, Tel +61 3 9639 9383. I'd never seen a more impressive pan than the cast iron monster used to serve my baked eggs. Had I gatecrashed a secret Scientology match-making brunch? Is that person reading a copy of Dianetics? Is that Kate Ceberano sitting in the corner? Why is that interstellar space plane hovering outside?



False alarm. It was just a pan... a very hot pan... filled with baked eggs, softened capsicum, Spanish onion, chorizo, tomato and goats cheese (although the menu said fetta). Without doubt the best baked eggs I've ever had (although it must be said that I don't order baked eggs very often).

If you don't fancy baked eggs, don't worry. You have many good options. The eggs benedict was excellent, with a magnificent, sharp hollandaise. There's a Triple Cheese Toasty with grilled cheddar, fontina and fior di latte mozzarella. Or sweeter options like cinnamon fruit toast; Greek donuts with apricot and chocolate ricotta; and house-made toasted muesli with poached berries.



The coffee is great. The service is great. The bentwood chairs are great. Even the freshly squeezed grapefruit juice is great.

In fact, it's hard to think of anything that isn't great about Balzari. It's just a pity they don't do breakfast during the week.

18/20 "best baked eggs"



Eggs & Bacon $11.50 BB100 +15%

Three One Two, Carlton

Mrs Jones has been replaced by a number. She is now called Three One Two, after her Drummond Street address, Tel +61 3 9347 3312. And she's had a face lift. I particularly like the splash of military-issue cammo netting hanging in the front window. Extra protection just in case Hezbollah start launching drive-by rocket attacks from Lygon Street.



Food-wise, it's steady as she goes in the McConnell kitchen. The weekend brunch menu is very much Circa, Reloaded. The trusty smoked salmon and cream cheese croque monsieur. The scrambled eggs with truss tomatoes and skewer of bacon. Doughnuts with chocolate dipping sauce. House made crumpets with clover honey.

I decided to try something new, so I took a punt on the pork sausage with white bean and tomato braise. Sounds fancy, doesn't it? Much fancier than beans and bangers on toast. And very nice it was, too. Especially the sesame crusted multi-grain toast, from Baker D. Chirico in St Kilda apparently. You only get one sausage, but I doubt you'll walk away hungry.

Perhaps the most unusual dish on offer at 312 was the prawn and sorrel omelette with green sauce. Prawns for breakfast. Hmmm...

17/20 "prawn omelette"



Eggs & Bacon $16.00 BB100 +60%