Greasy Joe's Slips

Finally, after all this time, Babka has a challenger (and I'm not talking beans). Greasy Joe's can thank the waitress in the stripy red top for its rapid slide from the Breakfast Blog Top 20 to not-worth-wasting-your-time-and-money. Not only did they fail to clear plates, and forget about coffee orders for well over 30 minutes, but when we walked up to re-order and inquire, they really didn't care. A couple of us even made a point of clearing our own plates, but still no-one got the message that perhaps we'd like some service.



Here are some tips for anyone running a cafe or restaurant:

1. Please try to look at the customers as you buzz about the venue. There is nothing more frustrating to be waiting for some help, your head bobbing up and down like a prairie dog, only to be treated like an invisible hobbit wearing the ring of power.

2. Make sure that, having ignored tip #1, when a customer starts wandering aimlessly around the venue in search of assistance, you show them some love and tell them you're sorry, even if you have to fake it. At this point, the customer may be a little sarcastic, as in, "Do you think maybe we could get our coffees within the next hour or two?" Don't be sarcastic back. Don't tell them "there's no need to be rude." Don't give them lip. Because if you've kept someone waiting over 30 minutes for a cup of coffee, they've earned a free pass to make at least two sarcastic comments, maybe even three. Grit your teeth and smile.

If only stripy red top knew these simple rules I might consider going back to GJ's one day. Unfortunately, she didn't. And I won't.

BTW, the eggs benny was OK, but nothing special. Go to The Galleon instead.

Richmond Hill Cafe and Larder

Well it must be said that RHCL is much better than I remember from previous visits. Best of all, they serve an excellent house-made sausage and buttered spinach. Pretty good scrambles, too...

The Galleon, St Kilda

The thing that's attached to the typewriter. Little animal with a ball. Little animal, small... Creeps about, not a rat.

Bubble, AbFab

If bubble you crave, then get yourself down to The Galleon, 9 Carlisle Street, Tel +61 3 9534 8934, where they serve it with squeak, and a big fat banger, on toast. Or sans banger, if you prefer. Bursting with peas, corn, and other items of mystery mush, it looked very satisfying.



Last time I was here I had the sweet potato hash cakes. This time I went for eggs benny, with ham and spinach, and a hash cake on the side. And a wise choice it was, even if I do say so myself. The eggs were good. The bagel was better than a muffin. The hollandaise was thick and creamy. A very respectable, if slightly unconventional, interpretation of the classic benedict.

The coffee was also very respectable. Well above average. As were the staff. A little quirky, like Bubble. But not nearly as stupid. Not stupid at all, actually.

The only problem with The Galleon is the lack of ventilation. On a hot day, you really need to go dressed in speedos and thongs. Any more clothing and you'll start to sweat. Someone did try to improve things by ripping a hole in the ceiling, but even that hasn't quite fixed the problem.