Cafe Beaubourg, Paris

I don't care if it was designed by a Pritzker laureate. Some cafes just scream 1980's. Like the Cafe Beaubourg, overlooking the Pompidou Centre in Paris, Tel +33 1 4887 6396. Grab some shoulder pads, pop on the Wayfarers, and slide that old Billy Ocean tape into your walkman. It's 1987 again and the markets are crashing...

Brasserie James, Clapham South

A global financial meltdown is probably not the ideal timing to be opening a mediocre restaurant in London. Which is bad news for Brasserie James, 47 Balham Hill, Clapham South, London, Tel +44 20 8772 0057. Because we are in the middle of a global financial meltdown and, based on their brunch performance, Brasserie James is mediocre.



The croque was average, at best. I like a nice thick croque. This one was model-thin. The eggs benedict was average. I like soft poached eggs. These were so hard we sent them back.

Tremont 647, Boston

During her ankle-bracelet days, Martha Stewart probably became quite attached to her pajamas. So it's no surprise that she's started wearing jim jams to work. But what about the rest of us? Won't we get arrested if we start roaming the streets in our sleepwear? Not if we live near the South End. It's pajama brunch every weekend at Tremont 647, 647 Tremont Street, Boston, MA, where staff and diners are free to flaunt their finest flannelette. Just try to keep the tiger in his cage...

Les Deux Magots, Paris

In England, they give their pubs strange names like "The Slug and Lettuce" and "The Fighting Cocks", so you could be forgiven for thinking that "Les Deux Magots" was named after a couple of flesh eating grubs. But it turns out that a "Magot" is some kind of Chinese statue. And "Les Deux Magots" is the name of a very famous "literary" cafe at 6 place Saint Germain des Prés, 75006 Paris, Tel +33 1 45 48 55 25.

Back to Babka

Last time I was here I enjoyed the kind of service that makes Qantas look good. But I decided it was time for a second opinion. Stephen Downes, for example, reckons Babka is "perhaps the best café in the known universe." Then again, Stephen Downes scored Vue de Monde 13/20, so maybe he's a few beans short of a burrito these days.



Speaking of beans, I'm pleased to report that the Georgian Baked Beans with crumbled feta are still the best in town. Perhaps the Milky Way? But is this really the best cafe in the universe? I think not.

Service today was OK, but nothing special. We were attended to by at least four different people before the food had arrived, and they were all pleasant enough.

Today's specials included a Croque Monsieur, which was actually a French toasted cheese sandwich. Sans jambon. Sans moutarde. So calling it a Croque was a bit of stretch. But it was quite a nice French toasted cheese sandwich nonetheless.



Babka is also in the running for best graffiti, with some cute babushka dolls sprayed on the front wall.

Annie Smithers Bistrot, Kyneton

You don't often see chicken livers on a breakfast menu. And it's not like I stumbled out of bed this morning thinking "mmm... I feel like a bit of liver." But there it was... chicken livers, bacon and spinach on toast. One of several tempting dishes on offer at Annie Smithers Bistrot, 72 Piper Street, Kyneton, Tel +61 3 5422 2039. I love the smell of offal in the morning.



If liver doesn't float your boat, I can also vouch for the eggs benedict (slightly under-poached but with good quality ham and an excellent tarragon-infused hollandaise), the corn fritters (with delicious thick-cut organic free-range bacon), the poached eggs (with a generous side of smoked salmon and spinach) and the croque monsieur (not bad, but a bit heavy on bread and light on filling).

The problem for Melbournians is that you have to drive an hour and a bit to Kyneton in order to enjoy these treats. But Kyneton is a dinky little town, so it makes for a good road trip. We even stumbled on a Saturday morning farmers' market.



The venue is country style with a touch of France, ie, Parisien cafe chairs with a nice blue and white weave. Sandblasted brick and bluestone walls are softened by hanging Persian rugs, while high ceilings and big windows give the room a spacious - if chilly - feel (a fireplace would make all the difference in Winter). And I was very pleased to see a Peugeot pepper grinder, and cool little eggs-shaped salt shakers, on every table. Real cloth napkins, too.

16/20 "mmm... liver"



Eggs & Bacon $8.50 BB100 -15%

Circa, St Kilda

Foodies love to bang on about Andrew McConnell, the part chef, part wizard who currently weaves his culinary magic at Circa, the Prince, 2 Acland Street, St Kilda, Tel +61 3 9536 1122. Such are his powers that I am thinking of starting a rumour that he is also, secretly, the Grand Master of the Priory of Sion, or at least one of the Senechaux. This is, after all, the man whose first restaurant was called Diningroom 211. Yes, that's right, 211... a perfect, inverted Fibonacci sequence. Think about that next time you're dining at the The Prince... and order yourself a Bloody Mary... Spooky.



Of course, after the disappointment of Mrs Jones (the Grand Master's other place of business), I arrived at Circa expecting a less-than-magical performance. The breakfast menu's have more than a passing similarity, with matching crumpet, doughnut and croque monsieur offerings, to name just three. So I was worried that my order of scrambled eggs was going to arrive in the style of an overcooked omelette, as it had during last week's visit to Mrs Jones.

Silly me. This was Circa. Holy ground. No mistakes allowed. The scrambles were flawless, and the breakfast experience up there with the very best.

Circa really gets it right at every level. The service is slick from the moment you arrive. The venue is spacious, stylish and comfortable, from the white leather banquettes to the theatrical mini-spots illuminating each table. And the food and coffee are truly excellent. Some of my extras weren't quite deserving of top marks (specifically the bacon skewers, toast and truss tomatoes, all of which were merely good), but just about everything else was. The smoked salmon croque monsieur, for example, was perfectly done, with a layer of dill-and-caper-infused cream cheese protecting the salmon from the perils of too much heat.

If you're careful, the Circa breakfast might only set you back around $20 a head. But throw in a couple of glasses of Pol Roger and you can double that. It's not cheap, but nor should it be. This is a special place.

19/20 "the grand master"