Legal Seafoods, Boston

America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between - Oscar Wilde

Decadent is a good word to describe the Eggs Oscar at Legal Seafoods, in the Prudential Center, 800 Boylston Street, Boston. It's kind of like eggs benedict, only with crabmeat and a few spears of asparagus. The pig got the day off.

Liar Liar, Hawthorn

I don't normally like sweet things, but...

Hashtastic

A little light on cornichons and some of the corned beef cubes were a little chewy, but all-in-all the Batch hash is a seriously good dish if you need a potato fix. The poached egg is a bonus.

Greasy Joe's Slips

Finally, after all this time, Babka has a challenger (and I'm not talking beans). Greasy Joe's can thank the waitress in the stripy red top for its rapid slide from the Breakfast Blog Top 20 to not-worth-wasting-your-time-and-money. Not only did they fail to clear plates, and forget about coffee orders for well over 30 minutes, but when we walked up to re-order and inquire, they really didn't care. A couple of us even made a point of clearing our own plates, but still no-one got the message that perhaps we'd like some service.



Here are some tips for anyone running a cafe or restaurant:

1. Please try to look at the customers as you buzz about the venue. There is nothing more frustrating to be waiting for some help, your head bobbing up and down like a prairie dog, only to be treated like an invisible hobbit wearing the ring of power.

2. Make sure that, having ignored tip #1, when a customer starts wandering aimlessly around the venue in search of assistance, you show them some love and tell them you're sorry, even if you have to fake it. At this point, the customer may be a little sarcastic, as in, "Do you think maybe we could get our coffees within the next hour or two?" Don't be sarcastic back. Don't tell them "there's no need to be rude." Don't give them lip. Because if you've kept someone waiting over 30 minutes for a cup of coffee, they've earned a free pass to make at least two sarcastic comments, maybe even three. Grit your teeth and smile.

If only stripy red top knew these simple rules I might consider going back to GJ's one day. Unfortunately, she didn't. And I won't.

BTW, the eggs benny was OK, but nothing special. Go to The Galleon instead.

Richmond Hill Cafe and Larder

Well it must be said that RHCL is much better than I remember from previous visits. Best of all, they serve an excellent house-made sausage and buttered spinach. Pretty good scrambles, too...

The Galleon, St Kilda

The thing that's attached to the typewriter. Little animal with a ball. Little animal, small... Creeps about, not a rat.

Bubble, AbFab

If bubble you crave, then get yourself down to The Galleon, 9 Carlisle Street, Tel +61 3 9534 8934, where they serve it with squeak, and a big fat banger, on toast. Or sans banger, if you prefer. Bursting with peas, corn, and other items of mystery mush, it looked very satisfying.



Last time I was here I had the sweet potato hash cakes. This time I went for eggs benny, with ham and spinach, and a hash cake on the side. And a wise choice it was, even if I do say so myself. The eggs were good. The bagel was better than a muffin. The hollandaise was thick and creamy. A very respectable, if slightly unconventional, interpretation of the classic benedict.

The coffee was also very respectable. Well above average. As were the staff. A little quirky, like Bubble. But not nearly as stupid. Not stupid at all, actually.

The only problem with The Galleon is the lack of ventilation. On a hot day, you really need to go dressed in speedos and thongs. Any more clothing and you'll start to sweat. Someone did try to improve things by ripping a hole in the ceiling, but even that hasn't quite fixed the problem.

Zaftigs, Brookline

Macintosh apple and Vermont sharp cheddar omelette...

Pops, Boston

Jaunts? Jaunts? You must be kidding. I'm over here in America dodging snow-scrapers and monster trucks, eating trans-fat for breakfast and people accuse me of having a jaunt? Then start moaning about the declining quality of Breakfast Blog content? Ex-squeeze me for a second while I purchase an automatic weapon and go postal. About the nearest thing I've had to a jaunt in the past 6 weeks was this brunch in the South End, at Pops, 560 Tremont Street, Boston, MA, Tel +1 (617) 695-1250.



For those stupid enough not to figure it out, I am working my fanny* off over here, and there may, accordingly, be some temporary interruptions to the usual schedule of Breakfast Blog transmissions. Sue me.

If you happen to get lucky with your own Boston boondoggle, one place you should not miss is Pops, where the salmon with soft scrambles is exceptionally good: delicate eggs, fresh salmon, crunchy shards of potato galette, and a delicious drizzle of Dijonaise caper sauce.

Another great dish is the "Deconstructed Red Flannel Hash and Eggs", which turned out to be a pile of finely-diced home-fries alongside a pile of finely-diced (and fried) corned beef, topped with a couple of perfectly-poached eggs. And just to be a pig, I had a side of griddled banana bread.

I won't attempt to cover the whole menu, but I will point out a few other highlights: omelettes with goat cheese and sage, or mushroom and truffle oil; French toast Monte Cristo, with ham, turkey, swiss cheese and strawberry jam; and chicken fried steak, served with eggs, gravy and roast potatoes.

Service is very good, venue is slick, and best of all, everything is quite affordable, at between $10 and $12 (the chicken fried steak is $15).

17/20 "popstar"


*Note to Australian readers, "fanny" means "bum" in America.

Sonsie, Boston

If it's bad eggs benedict you seek, look no further than Sonsie, 327 Newbury St, Boston, MA, Tel +1 (617) 351-2500. The eggs were half-raw, ditto the muffins, and the hollandaise tasted weird, and not in a good way. Clearly people don't come here for the food. Maybe it's all about the people watching? No Tom and Gisele sightings on my watch.

Tremont 647, Boston

During her ankle-bracelet days, Martha Stewart probably became quite attached to her pajamas. So it's no surprise that she's started wearing jim jams to work. But what about the rest of us? Won't we get arrested if we start roaming the streets in our sleepwear? Not if we live near the South End. It's pajama brunch every weekend at Tremont 647, 647 Tremont Street, Boston, MA, where staff and diners are free to flaunt their finest flannelette. Just try to keep the tiger in his cage...