Observatory Cafe, South Yarra

I've never been in prison, but I reckon Oz is about as real as prison drama gets. And I've never had a prison breakfast, but I reckon the service at the Observatory Cafe, Birdwood Avenue, South Yarra, Tel +61 3 9650 5600, is about as close a match as you could hope to find. Line up. Grab a tray. Place your order. Wait over there. Prisoner number 194... grub's up.



And what presentation. Slip, slop, slap... Slip on some mushies, slop on some scrambles, and slap on a hat... or toast, in this case. Since when did toast become a garnish?

It's a pity that the Observatory went down the no-service path. It has a brilliant location right next to the Royal Botanic Gardens, and the food is actually quite good. With a little more effort, and a little less price gouging, it could be a contender. But $19.50 to stand in line for the "big breakfast"... who are they kidding? Strictly a tourist trap.

10/20 "take a number"